10 Things You Must Know About Marriage

By Pst. Ejiofor Godwin

Ejiofor Godwin is a marriage counselor, a pastor, author and an educator.

He runs a ministry called Excellent Family Ministry with a divine mandate to raise excellent husbands, wives and youths for a fulfilling and blissful family.

In this piece, he analyzes 10 key factors needed for a peaceful and successful marriage.

1. Marriage is a personal decision to live together with someone till death. DON’T ALLOW ANY BODY TO CHOOSE FOR YOU, PROPHESY FOR YOU OR SEE VISION OF WHO TO MARRY FOR YOU. If you don’t yet know what you need in a man or woman, you are not mature enough to marry.

2. Marriage is not all about MONEY, BEAUTY, STATUS AND WEALTH. Your spouse can have all these yet you will be unhappy and unfulfilled. Marry for AGAPE LOVE and DEEP UNDERSTANDING OF A NEED FOR A RELATIONSHIP.

3. Do not have any expectation from who you want to marry. Be persuaded that you are the person he or she needs to be successful and not the other way round. DON’T LOOK FOR SOMETHING ON THE TABLE, BRING SOMETHING TO THE TABLE.

4. Marriage is not a reformatory where people are made to change. You will be highly frustrated if you marry a person to change him or her. BE PERSUADED THAT YOU CAN TOLERATE ALL YOU HAVE SEEN IN HIM OR HER WHILE IN COURTSHIP OR FRIENDSHIP even in the marriage.

5. As a lady, don’t make the mistake of believing that your husband is your PROVIDER who will provide for you all you need as a wife. Be a responsible lady of substance; an ASSET and not A LIABILITY else, you will be disappointed.

6. Marriage requires DISCIPLINE AND SELF CONTROL. Start now to discipline your sexual appetite because you may marry a person with either a low or a high libido. Marriage is not all about sex. It is about UNDERSTANDING and TOLERANCE.

7. No matter the number of marriage books you have read and how many marriage seminars you have attended or how long you fasted and prayed to make a choice of a wife or a husband; THERE MUST BE MISUNDERSTANDING between you and your spouse. So start now to learn the principles of CONFLICT RESOLUTION.

8. You may have heard that YOU DON’T NEED A THIRD PARTY IN. YOUR MARRIAGE and you have bought into that narrative. I can assure you that there are situations a third party is inevitable. This is why you should marry.